Currently Listening Nimrod By Green Day see related

i guess thats what i get...

i think everything i do, i seriously screw up for myself. i'm such an idiot sometimes. doing things that i know aren't right, or aren't very smart... but still doing them because it seems great at the time.

i hate it that i got attached, and i let myself do something that i knew probably would get me screwed over. but i did it, i liked him too much and it got shitty. i even knew it was going to happen... i saw it comming and im apparently not smart enough to get out of the way. i say it doesn't bother me... i say its cool just being friends, but its not... its shitty just being friends. i was so vulnerable, and trusting... but never again. i mean, don't get me wrong... i'll get over it. i just feel so used and.... hurt. i'm such a dumb shit.

but this is for you (and you know who you are) - i'm really not trying to make you feel bad in any of this. i knew when this whole thing got started that you're just a 16 year old, and thats how it plays out sometimes... that shit might not always go just like i wanted. i told myself from the get go that this could happen. but then i let myself get attached to you... this is completely my fault how i feel, so please don't feel bad. i think you're an amazing person, and you have so much more talent than what you give yourself credit for...
i'll see you in the majors, you better make bank with the yankees, even though they suck and you know that you want to play for the braves!

Currently Listening A Fever You Can't Sweat Out By Panic! At The Disco see related

summer, you slay me

so, i just picked up my job at sonic again, which means that i have about 4 jobs. but, i won't complain because i think i'm a workaholic. I work from 5am - 2pm at sonic, then 2:30 - 4:30 at central, then 5pm - close at pizza hut. It gets pretty crazy these days, but there's so much stuff that i want and i need money to do those things... so there ya go.

i also have this interest... and i like him A LOT. But sometimes, it takes a little bit of patience and hmmm how do i say... trust in what he says is true... i have a problem with beleive people when they say that they like me back. sometimes i just need to be told. but, i guess that's the girl side of me... i probably need to stop that. i'm trying i swear.

Currently Listening All the Right Reasons By Nickelback see related

Look at this photograph
Every time I do it makes me laugh
How did our eyes get so red?
And what the hell is on Joey’s head?
 
This is where I grew up
I think the present owner fixed it up
I never knew we ever went without
The second floor is hard for sneakin’ out
 
This is where I went to school
Most of the time had better things to do
Criminal record says I broke in twice
I must’ve done it half a dozen times
 
I wonder if it’s too late
Should I go back and try to graduate
Life’s better now than it was back then
If I was them, I wouldn’t let me in
 
Every memory of looking out the back door
I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor
It’s hard to say
It’s time to say it
Goodbye, Goodbye
Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for
 
It's hard to say 
It’s time to say it
Goodbye, Goodbye
 
Remember the old arcade
Blew every dollar that we ever made
The cops hated us hangin’ out
They say somebody went and burned it down
 
We used to listen to the radio
And sing along with every song we’d know
We said someday we’d find out how it feels
To sing to more than just the steering wheel
 
Kim’s the first girl I kissed
I was so nervous that I nearly missed
She’s had a couple of kids since then
I haven’t seen her since God knows when
 
I miss that town
I miss their faces
You can’t erase
You can’t replace it
I miss it now
I can’t believe it
So hard to stay
Too hard to leave it
If I could relive those days
I know the one thing that would never change
 
Look at this photograph
Every time I do it makes me laugh
Every time I do it makes me

So, it's been over a month since i've posted. That's a really long time. I used to be addicted to this thing, and update like everyday, but then i realized that no one really needs to know all that much about my life. I don't know, maybe you do but i don't think so. there's not really a lot that happens.. i just work, and go to school, and spend time with robert. that's it...

oh well. peace.